Things are rarely
what you think
they pretend to be.
Do not mistake
Surviving and thriving
are two different things.
The intolerable tyrant will meet a mighty end.
The worst of fates Beset
those who dismiss and abuse
Boys who want to be Gods
pretending to be men.
will be cast in stone
and tossed below
for their sins.
Artemis is hunting.
Caireen is crying out.
Stylianos has abandoned refuge
and Jizo is awake.
Nicholas of Myra is a
Patron on the take.
There is work to be done
for the cause of the soul.
A child kept
in a cage
Ask Bes to keep you.
The storm is quick to rise.
Time is watching now
and it’s ready for a fight.
Beset- Female counterpart to Bes
Artemis- Diana Nemorensis
Nicholas of Myra- Saint Nicholas
Caireen- Cailleach’s Irish Counterpart (although I believe they are two different imaginings)
Jizo- Jizo Bodhisattva
I make these lists year by year of the lessons I’ve learned and the truths that I’ve found. I make them in order to track my age and forge an alliance with myself. This little annual inventory is taken from a year of scribbling my thoughts down:
- There is always a bird singing somewhere. Always.
- Creativity takes courage. No additional skills are required.
- Pandora never had a box. She had a jar.
- Interrogate your ego often. It should never be bigger than your dreams.
- Tuesdays and Thursdays are the worst traffic days.
- BBC Radio 4 Podcasts are best played on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
- There is always a way to give thanks and something/someone to be grateful for.
- Cynicism is lazy.
- Love Yourself and the universe will follow suit.
- Defiance Disorder: it’s a thing, look it up.
- Some people write to remember, I write to understand.
- My Orion is a Lady.
- Screw shame and the guilt it rode in on.
- The sea is always right.
- If you need an illustrated font to remind you to ‘Be Kind’ you are in big trouble.
- Trust Yourself, it’s all true.
- Shame’s trusted companion will always be regret. They come and go together. Be prepared.
- Re-read the words that changed you. Know who you are.
- There are no straight lines in nature. The concept is manmade just like perfection.
- We really are the stuff of stars.
- John and Abigail Adams had a remarkable and profound relationship.
- Trust your gut. Intuition only speaks when it has something to say.
- Don’t cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it. Forgive.
- I am an apt pupil, at ease in solitude. I am not a social creature but I do love people and that’s OKAY. (This one took a long time to figure out)
- Patience is Paramount.
- Be a detective. If something thrills your soul, dig in deep. Find out everything you can. Curiosity is its own reward.
- 38 years in and I am still astonished by the everyday assumptions we all make. Don’t assume anything about anyone ever. When people speak to you, listen completely, don’t let a preconception do the talking. The story, integrity, and beauty of a person will speak in the details.
- Shyness and insecurity, while all well and good, are not the same as quiet and contemplative.
- Take in the sunrise when you can.
- Write it all down, draw it all out. Legacy and expression are not reserved for an idol class. Everyone should write a memoir as far as I’m concerned.
- The sounds of a tapping keystroke, rushing water, and my daughter singing will always center me. Listen to your day.
- Cater to your imagination. Give it a safe space to grow up and run around in. Let it do the building.
- Everyone has his or her own personal battles. Anatidaephobia: A person suffering from this condition feels that somewhere in the world, a duck or a goose is watching him/her (not attacking or touching, simply watching the individual).
- Fear mongers in the dark, flock to the light.
- Look up, look up, look up, the sky is waiting for you.
- Embrace change, it is a reliable constant. Make use of it.
- Confront the Bear.
- When you give, give freely.
Note: My notes are personal truths. A collection of the reminders I write to myself and my Bird.
Sometimes when I am in the past,
I can see the things that were meant to be.
A shrewd and subtle foreboding persists there, collecting dust.
We all played our parts in it,
made sacrifices and surrendered endlessly to it.
Greedy for attention and simple recognition of
how special we really were.
Everyone watching and waiting then,
learning how to survive.
Slaves to ambition,
slinging drinks and talking shit.
We were deep in hope then,
Rest easy old friend, when you need to find me
I’ll be in solace tucked, quietly away.
Sidelines, garden sheds, corners in the shade.
A place where the noise can’t touch
in the light of day.
I never did fit in quite right,
awkward and aloof.
My mind, simple and demanding
collecting stories and sorting truths.
I have always been an apt pupil
at ease in solitude.
The translation of this has long been mocked
and called by many names:
Lack of confidence,
a consequential guilt.
and my favorite mishap, shame.
I call it self-possessed
by my own name.
Rest easy old friend,
for time has surely shown,
I will be here in the end
just as I have always been.
Embedded in a quiet
of the mind
I call home.
I never did fit in quite right
and you are not alone.
When the sun arrived, it was all made purple.
The bright reminder of time’s earthly holdings.
Hello and Goodbye.
We are all just tiny reflections,
a twinkle in the eye
of a larger fate.
Vastly insignificant when all is said
Little drops of life
composing of one.
Because of the rooster,
the insisting, demeaning, and demanding.
The lonely loud cock
stained with the fortune
of freezing time.
Because of this rooster,
stuck in a cycle of violence,
stuck between day and night.
Because of this damn rooster,
the mornings come
before the light.
I’ve met my Owl, he lives in the wood.
He is large like my eagle, but harder to see.
His painted wings wear the mask of the trees.
How he found me, I will not know.
He was only in my dreaming then, decades ago.
My mind was an explosion then, ready to blow.
That was my beginning then, but now he is here.
Hunting and watching on this sacred ground.
I can see him, fear him, and love him,
my eyes are open now.
When all is said
and all is done,
we were two
made into one.
We did this growing,
in secret, we did.
When no one was watching,
and the seasons were still.
We faded into ourselves,
on this hill.